Where I’ve been

It’s been awhile since I’ve posted! A long while actually. And honestly, it isn’t because I’ve been super busy (though I have) but also because my brain has been a little bit tapped dry. 

I was sitting around my apartment last week (after we FINALLY moved in a week late) and realized that I had no idea what to actually blog about. My life has been in a ton of turmoil, and I haven’t had any actual solid thoughts that weren’t selfish or concerned with my own life. 

And honestly, that isn’t as big of an issue as I make it seem. From the outside, my life is great. I have amazing sisters, an amazing family, amazing friends, an amazing apartment and I go to an amazing school.

However, I’ve been dealing with a lot of things mentally that have caused me to not want to write. 

1. My apartment was a week late in opening- after lots of construction this summer the apartment complex I’m living in opened a week later than they had planned, putting us all in a hotel for a week- and some people still living there.
2. My friendships are rocky- I love my friends, I do. But lately there have been a lot of things bothering me. I’m trying to figure out if it’s me, or them, or both. And what I can do to fix the situation. 
3. School is stressful- I’m taking 18 hours of classes. And a lot of it is dense heavy material, and upper level classes. This is the same hours that I’m used to ( though more than the typical college student) and on top of that, it’s just a lot of work.
4. My family life is stressful- I’ve been dealing with issues with my family that I won’t post on the internet. But not the most pleasant of things. Lots of fights between me and my parents that I really need to figure out how to handle.

With all of that going on, it’s hard to focus on anything else. It’s hard to come up with creative and exciting material to blog about, and it’s hard to honestly care. 

I’m here- I swear. And hopefully I will begin posting things again soon- as I’m starting to get back into my quirky blog thoughts. But thats where I’ve been the past couple of weeks. And an amazing thank you to those of you who follow me, and have stayed with me. Emailing me, tweeting me, and messaging me making sure I’m still around.

I love you all. 

The 4 friends you will meet in life

Recently, I’ve been realizing how much friendships really mean to me. And along that line I have been weeding out a lot of fake friendships and people who really aren’t a good part of my life, as well as those who are. 

1. The “when it’s good for her” friend

This is the girl who wants to be your friend when it benefits her in some way, or she has time for it. If she is busy, or it doesn’t benefit her then she doesn’t care. This is the type of person who when you’re going through a hard time will say “I don’t have time to talk to you about this” and things like that. The one who will avoid being your actual friend unless she needs something, or she thinks it will get her something (like a ride to something, or dinner or something like that). 

2. The “friend of a friend” friend

This is the girl you meet because she’s friends with one of your super close friends. She’s fun to be around, you enjoy her and she is a super nice girl. But she changes drastically between when you’re with your friend and when you aren’t with you friend. Basically, she has a changing personality that most of the time you wont be able to keep up with. 

3. The “I just like to drink” friend

This is the girl who is the most known at parties. She flirts with all of the guys, gets drunk and you somehow end up babysitting her almost every time unless you’re drunk too. She isn’t really worried about much else other than her partying, her boyfriend, and her hungover Panera the next morning. 

4. The best friend

This is the girl that even when the other 3 are being crazy and you can’t handle it and think you don’t belong is there for you. She understands truly what friendship is and values having yours. This is the girl that will pick you up from scary guys houses just before she was about to fall asleep, and in return you help set her up with guys, make her food, and the friendship moves on. This is the girl that knows all of your secrets- and keeps them. And the girl you can call at 2am.

You will meet these people. They will drive you crazy. You will want to kill them. But the truth is, even when they are crappy friends you will probably care about them. My best suggestion to you is to just let it slide off your shoulders. Worry about what you are doing with your life and thats it. If you are having a rough day, go talk to your best friend and move on. Party with the friend that likes to drink, don’t let it bother you when the girl who changes personalities has one of her shifts and just pretend like you didn’t notice, and lastly, don’t feed into the girl who is only your friend when she wants to be. Keep her at a distance, and don’t do things for her like she expects you to. 

Good friends aren’t easy to come by, and when you do-keep them around. But if you get stuck with a friend like this- it isn’t a good friend. Unless it’s your best friend. 

I’m so ready to go back to school!

3 more days! 

In three days I head back to Fayetteville and join my beautiful sisters and best friends in beginning to prepare for our amazing recruitment and the fantastic new class of sisters that will be joining us in just two weeks! Recruitment is going to be so stressful, but honestly so worth it. Meeting the new girls on bid day, and the fabulous nap I’m going to take in my brand new apartment afterwards is going to be fabulous.

Oh, yeah thats right- in just a little over a WEEK i get to move into my new apartment with my best friend and our other two best friends. I am so excited to get to room with 3 sisters who mean the absolute world to be and have my best friend literally be steps from me. This will be so convenient when I am having a wardrobe issue and need her help, I wont have to wait for her to come from the building over! Oh, and her obsession with doing dishes can finally be put to good use!

All four of us have kind of decided what our tasks are going to be Molly is going to wash the dishes & clean, Hannah is going to do the laundry, Megan is going to take out the trash & I’m going to cook.

Seriously this year is going to be fab.

Oh, and not to mention- after that amazing nap I’m going to take on bid day- the next day CLASSES START. Like what? I’m getting ready to enter into my sophomore/junior year of college! Can you say crazy? Crazy. Seriously. I’m so excited for classes to start. I think the start of a new school year always excites me because it’s new subjects, new classes, new learning. I’m a nerd- I absolutely love to learn. It’s my favorite. And I can’t wait to be able to get back to learning things I’m actually truly passionate about.

In case anyone cares this semester I’m taking: African American History 1877-Present; Terrorism In Politics; Intro to International Relations; News Reporting I; Criminology; and Intro to Philosophy. 

Sadly, two of those classes (African American History & Intro to Phil) I have to take and am not that excited about, BUT everything else will be so much fun and I can’t even wait.

But on top of that:

I GOT THE JOBBBBBBBB. I applied, and interviewed for and LANDED a job working at the National Phone Campaign on campus as a “Hog Caller” what it is is we call prospects and try to help and raise money for the university and different things on campus. The money goes directly to the program and student benefit immediately. It has perfect hours 5:15-9 twice a week and one Sunday shift. Which works absolutely amazing with everything else that I have going on in my life (classes, clubs, sorority, family, just life in general) and is a great opportunity for me to have a job while still focusing on school and not using the crap out of my gas to get there like my last job.

This upcoming year is shaping up to have an amazing beginning. From amazing classes, living with my best friend, to an amazing job opportunity, to the blessings I have been realizing I have in my every day life- I really can’t wait for it to start. Just a few short days til I’m back with everyone and starting this beautiful year.

College moving is the biggest pain ever

Everyone hates moving. If you like it, you don’t own nearly as much stuff as I do. Or as much as the typical person for that matter. I don’t think it’s awful 1000%. I mean you get to move somewhere new, you get a new room, new decorating ideas and things like that- but you also have to reduce your entire life to boxes, trash bags, and lets be serious any bag you can find that holds more than one thing. 

On that note, as much as I hate it, I have moved 4 times in the last year and just packed all of my stuff up in my summer apartment to move it back home, just to repack and move it back to school again in 2 weeks. 

So of the way too many times I’ve moved this year, I’ve learned quite a few things to share with you. I’m splitting this in two, because moving to college for the first time- and moving into your first apartment are two completely different problems. 

5 tips for packing for your college dorm room

1. You will not wear 14 pairs of jeans – Lets be serious y’all, everyone thinks that they need to bring their entire closet with them when they move to college. Either because they can’t choose which outfits they like best or “you never know when you’ll wear it.” But I promise you, if you haven’t worn it in the last 6 months you will not wear it when you are at school. Yes, that includes all 14 pairs of jeans in your closet, and your 3 super cute red white and blue skirts. Bring 1 of those skirts, and half of your jeans. Trust me. Not only will you be able to actually fit it all in your closet, but you won’t even miss the stuff you left at home.

2. Home is not a dark vortex that throws away things you left there– So say you did miss your other 7 pairs of jeans or whatever else you possibly left at home. It is not gone forever, it is just at home. Seriously, when you move to school your parents can send you something you need. It is not the end of the world if you really need that random pair of flip flops you left on your floor. You can either a.) go buy the same pair of flip flops or b.) have your parents send them to you. Calm down, it will be okay. It’s not like you threw them in a dark hole.

3. Blankets and fans and lights oh my- One regret I have about moving into college was assuming that my itty bitty little fan would be fabulous, and my one set of sheets would be warm enough. No. To both. You will most likely need a fan, and I suggest one that attaches to your bed. They sell them like that, or you can buy a flat one and attach a hook. Because thats where you’re going to need it the most. Also, your super cute set of sheets and comforter will not be enough to keep you warm. And unless you plan on taking the time to wash all of your sheets in one day (which will take forever) it will no be enough. Bring cute fleece blankets, and another set of sheets. But one thing you probably won’t need that every single college shopping website tells you you need is a desk lamp. Check out your schools website, but most desks actually have a built in lamp. And it’s pretty handy, and leaves room in your boxes for some more blankets, and that fan. (PS, the fan below is $30 at BB&B!)

4. If you don’t know, don’t- Basically, if you have been going back and forth about bringing something to school. Don’t bring it. If you need it, your parents can send it to you. It’s that simple. Trust me, not once in my entire first semester of college did I use my mini iron or ironing board- thats what the dryer touch-up cycle is for, right? But the point is, I didn’t need it. I should have left it at home. Oops. Learn from my mistake.

5. Please talk to your roommate- You do not need two microwaves, two mini fridges, two televisions and two shelves. I mean if you have room for it (where the hell do you go to school, seriously tell me) then go for it, but you probably won’t. And it’s pointless, and a waste of money. I promise. 

5 tips for moving into your first apartment

1. Figure out how to get plugged in before you actually need it- I moved into my apartment during finals week. And didn’t realize I had no idea how to use the wifi until about an hour before I had to turn in a final online. Oops. When you move in, figure out how to set up your internet, if you have wifi- do you need a router or just a code? if you don’t have wifi- can you get wifi? or are there ethernet connections provided? Also, buy an ethernet cord. If your apartment provides you wifi it will probably suck about 90% of the time because the entire complex is pretty much using it all the time- just like you. Also, figure out if you have cable, if you do- where is your cable connection? what channels do you get? can you pay for more channels? It may seem simple, but I didn’t have my TV set up until I had been in my apartment for a month because I’m an idiot and didn’t pay attention to where to set up my TV so I could plug it into the cable outlet. 

2. You will actually need cleaning supplies- Invest in an amazing vacuum cleaner, a swiffer, appliance cleaner, shower cleaner, bleach, a broom and a dust pan. It seems simple, but I didn’t own a vacuum, a swiffer, a broom or a dust pan when I moved into my apartment. I bought all of them in one day. My wallet hated me but my apartment was beautiful. 

3. Sam’s club is your friend- My parents added me to their Sam’s club membership when I moved down here for school about a year ago. But I honestly never once used it until I moved into my apartment. Partially because living with 3 other girls I didn’t need to buy as much myself in my dorm, and partially because I was using more stuff living by myself. One of my friends and I did kind of an experiment to see who spent more money over the summer by me going to Sam’s and her just getting things when she needed them at Walmart. I won. By a lot. Seriously, sam’s club will save you a ton of money, go, get a membership and own it. 

4. If you have a roommate, talk to them- It’s like moving into your dorm room again, but it’s an apartment. And this time, I promise you you really don’t need 2 blenders, 40 plates, 40 cups and 60 forks. If you have a roommate you know, seriously split it up because it will be a pain otherwise. If you have a roommate you don’t know, try and find out if you like them enough to share stuff with them and split it up. Because otherwise if will be a pain and a ton of money. Make friends with your roommates, you do have to live with them.

5. Decorate, but don’t over decorate- You seriously don’t need all 5 of those cute vases you found at Pier One and you really don’t need both of those giant monograms for your wall. One will do. Choose a room color scheme/stick to it, and decorate accordingly. You don’t need your apartment to look like a tacky, overdecorated mess. It isn’t cute. Decorate cute, buy some canvases and craft, or put some pictures you buy up on your walls, get some color coordinated baskets, a lamp and a cute rug. Done. Please don’t be the person who when you walk in you don’t know where to put your eyes because you have like a million things everywhere. And guys, if you’re reading this. DECORATE. You will be a million time more attractive if you know how to decorate a room (or enough sense to have a friend, your mom or your sister do it) rather than me sitting on your couch staring at the completely blank brown wall in front of me. Yuck. 

Lastly, google is your friend. For both moving into an apartment or a dorm room. Google “first apartment lists” or “dorm shopping lists” by reading them, you’ll be like “OH I DO NEED THAT” or laugh to yourself and wonder why in the world anyone would need 4 different kinds of hangars for a dorm room, or a portable closet. 

 

The 10 things I learned my freshman year of college

I’ve been talking to a lot of incoming freshman who are scared, confused, and nervous about school starting in a few weeks. So I decided to share a little bit of advice of things I learned my freshman year that I wish someone told me earlier.

1. Worries from home don’t automatically just go away because you left

Literally every freshman, or person leaving home for the first time thinks this. The fight you got in with your friend wont matter because you’re leaving, the argument you and your mom have daily won’t matter. Nothing will matter because you’re starting over. And in part this is true because you get to choose your battles more carefully, but at the same time, leaving home for the first time and going to school makes you confront all of your worries head on and makes you deal with them. Be ready to deal with them. Because your arguments with your friends from home will still be there when you’re a thousand miles away from each other, they will probably get worse. Your ex boyfriend will not stop being on your mind just because you don’t see him every day- at least not right away. It gets better, but the mindset that everything just suddenly doesn’t matter isn’t true. Everything still exists. And you will still worry about it. College isn’t a magical time zone that causes you to forget literally everything that has happened in the last 18 years of your life and be completely carefree the second you step on campus. But it does offer new beginnings.

2. If you join a sorority of fraternity don’t just do it because of the reputation or the letters

Honestly, the best piece of advice I can give anyone going greek comes from the movie “Sorority Wars” it sounds cheesy but it is oh so true.. “Look around at what the people there stand for, because soon you’re going to stand for it too.” Or something like that, it’s been awhile since I’ve seen that movie. If the most important thing to you is whether the sorority you get into parties with the best frat, has the reputation for the hottest girls, and gets the drunkest on saturday nights.. Then that’s the sorority you’re going to be in. If what’s important to you is the sisterhood, the philanthropy, and whether or not you see yourself becoming friends with the girls. Then that’s the sorority you’re going to be in. Whats important in choosing where you’re going to spend the rest of your life is truly the feeling you get when talking to the other girls. If you can’t see yourself having a conversation with them at 3am crying over cat videos and whether or not Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez are still together, or driving around blasting Luke Bryan at the top of your lungs at 3 in the afternoon, or making vines of you twerking on random buildings around campus. Then those may not be the girls for you. Choose where you feel comfortable, and where you see yourself belonging. Not where the the letters seem the coolest or the ones that have the best reputation on campus. Letters are more than just Greek, and reputations can be changed. The friendships you make last forever.

3. Please actually have to go to class, study, and learn things

Seriously. Go. Pay attention, take notes and listen to every word your professor is saying because I promise you it will be on the exam. Not every class is like this, but those that are are the ones that can make a difference between your 4.0 and your 3.5 or your 3.5 and your 3.0. No one wants to explain to their parents that literally the only reason why they didn’t do as well as they thought they would freshman year is because they couldn’t make themselves get out of bed on a friday morning to go to their 9:30am class. Yes, it sucks, yes it will kill you, and yes you will skip some days. But wake up, go to class. And next semester don’t torture yourself with that class if you’re not a morning person. And besides just going to class, you will have to actually study. Take it from the girl who slept through AP english junior and senior year and somehow graduated with almost a 4.0. You will have to learn things you have never wanted to learn in your life, and you will have to study to pass classes. Take it from me that Basic Econ kicked my ass last semester. Like, kicked it to the moon and back but I got a B. With lots of studying, a few all nighters, and some help from my tutor.

4. You will go out on school nights and do other things you said you wouldn’t

Going into freshman year I swore I would never go out on a school night, or get super drunk, or drunkenly kiss a guy I have never met before. And I’m pretty sure I did all three of those things within the first month of school and more. You don’t have to, people won’t make fun of you if you don’t go out, people won’t make fun of you if you don’t drink, and they won’t laugh at you for staying in and watching Netflix. Everyone has those days. But I promise you, you will kick yourself if you don’t go out at least a few times, see whats out there and meet new people. If you drink, have a few nights you don’t remember. But learn your limit, and stick to it- first semester of freshman year is only an excuse for so long. But have fun. Some of my best memories from freshman year include me breaking literally every single rule I set for myself before I left. Thirsty Thursday is a real thing, and it is real fun. Yes, you will still have class friday morning. But sometimes the memories you make are just as important as the class you half sleep through the next morning.

5. Talk to the people that sit next to you in class, you never know who you’ll meet

I sat through my entire math class first semester of freshman year 3 days a week for an hour and didn’t speak to a single person the entire time. I don’t think you understand how amazing that is for me- or how boring that class was. I dreaded going to class. I realize looking back that it was 10000% my fault, I didn’t try to talk to anyone, or get to know a single soul. I loved all of my other classes because I talked to the people around me, and got to meet so many people. On a campus as large as mine, it’s amazing how many times a day you can say hi to people you pass on the way to class, simply by getting to know them during class. And they may get you places on campus that you never realized you could go. For example, the kid who sat next to me in my journalism class first semester was suitemates with the first kid I dated on campus. Sure Jeff was an asshole and I can’t believe I even wasted the time I did on him, but I wouldn’t have met him without Jeremy. For example again, the girl who I became amazing friends with from my Theatre Lecture class helped me get into student government when I was running for it because she knew a lot of people on the committee. Talking to the people around you in class can help the campus feel smaller, can help you meet more people, can help you pass the class (study groups are a real thing, and really helpful) and can make going to class more enjoyable. It may seem like a really obvious piece of advice, but you have no idea how many people go through an entire semester not speaking to a single soul around them.

PS: For girls going into greek life, the guys in your classes are also a great place to scour for dates to those awkward first few functions before you know many people! Trust me!

6.Homesickness if real, you will get homesick, beg your dad/mom to let you drive home, and cry because you miss your dog 

I was literally the girl who could NOT wait to get out of Missouri for college, to go as far away as I possibly could and never look back. I swore up and down that I would not be homesick and that I wouldn’t ever want to come home because I was an independent person who didn’t need my parents as much as they thought that I needed them. Oh my gosh was I wrong. I called my dad and mom crying so many times first semester it is not even funny, I threatened to transfer schools, drop out, come home, etc etc. As much as you say you aren’t going to miss your parents, the second they aren’t the people you see when you come home every night- it becomes reality that you really are on your own. I honestly can’t explain what it is but it happens. You miss your bed, you miss your moms nagging, and you miss the $50 your dad would give you if your pouted your lip and asked nicely. You miss everything. Even the shitty traffic from downtown to your house. It’s crazy and it’s unexplainable, but I promise you it gets easier. If you can make it through your first semester and get comfortable, it gets so much easier. You get into a routine, you find the right balance between going home to see your parents, and having fun with your friends on campus. You also begin to realize the family you’re forming around you on campus, and the homesickness gets easier. But it’s okay to miss home. Just realize that being away is a part of growing up, and don’t give up on being away just because it’s hard. It’ll make you a stronger person.

7. You will meet the people you will call your best friends for the rest of your life

I hate people. Seriously, they annoy me. Girls are too catty, too dramatic and care way too much about what other people think of them. Guys smell, don’t say enough and don’t like to watch stupid TV and music videos with me. I’ve always had friends- don’t get me wrong. But I am definitely the type of person who has to have my alone time to survive, and cannot spend excessive amounts of time around the same person. Yep, thats what I thought at least. I met a million people my freshman year, and that’s probably not an exaggeration. I’ve met girls I call to go out on Friday night, guys I call to pick me up when I don’t want to walk anywhere on Friday night, girls to call to go out for sushi on a Tuesday because I don’t feel like studying, guys I call to come over and make me laugh when I want to punch a hole in the wall, and people I honestly wouldn’t replace for the world. But on top of all of that, I met my best friends. The girls who are going to be my bridesmaids at my wedding and who I can spend every waking moment around and not want to kill them. These are the girls who bought me a chocolate cake when my boyfriend broke up with me, send me stupid pictures throughout the day, watch ESPN strong man competitions with me and sing loudly into the steering wheel in the middle of nowhere. These are also the girls who I can sit down in a room with and just be quiet, and it’s like we’ve had an entire conversation. Yes, your high school friends are important. But the friends you make (and keep) in college are the ones who will be there for the rest of your life. I promise you.

8. Money does not grow on trees, bushes, or out of magic spells

Get a job, a sugar daddy, or beg your parents for an allowance. Sure, you have your rent, school and meal plan paid for. But other things come up. And I promise you, the thousand dollars you have in your checking account saved up for freshman year will not last you nearly as long as you thought it would. From late night trips to Wal Mart, to the latest movies, to that super cute pair of heels you found on sale at the mall that you just had to have- it goes fast. Take it from the girl that overdrafted her account the first 3 months of school. No my parents were not happy, but yes- I lived. Living on your own, you will learn more about money management than you ever wanted to know. Because yes, the $.25 ramen noodles taste exactly the same as the $.75 ones, and splurging on the good lunch meat, bread and milk is actually important. The best advice I can give you is figure out what is important to you, set a budget and stick to it. You will probably blow it once or twice. But life is live and learn. I promise you after $60 worth of overdraft fees you probably won’t do it again. Freshman year will teach you the value of a dollar, based on exactly what you can get out of it, how far it will stretch and how hard it is to find. You will also learn the cheapest thing on the Taco Bell menu, the easiest way to earn money on and around campus, and exactly how to extract money from your frugal fathers wallet. If you already know how to manage your money, kudos to you. But i didn’t and I sure as hell did learn.

9. The future is the scariest thing you will ever think about 

You’re in college, finally you’re out of your parents house and on your own and on your way to becoming whatever you want to be. Wait, what do you want to be exactly? Even the people most set in their majors who come in swearing they will not change their major will wonder if they chose the right major at least once, take a class that makes them wonder exactly what they want to do with the rest of their life. And panic because college is hard and they would rather drop out and become a stripper. I promise. It will happen. Most college students at one time or another would rather just be a stripper or a hobo because homework is hard, teachers are mean, the future is only bright when you think about the tequila shots you will be downing on friday night. I want to be a lawyer, and I have found myself wondering a million times this past year if I really want to major in Poli Sci, if I really want to go to law school, what I want to do with my law degree, if I’m smart enough to get into law school, if I can even graduate college, if the LSAT is really that hard, and lastly, I wonder why I am torturing myself by being so ambitious. But at the end of the day, no matter how much you doubt yourself, you will end up where you are meant to be. You may not take the road you thought you would to get there. But the future is bright beyond friday night, because even when you hate your major, and you have no idea what you want to do with your future- you have a future and that is what is important. You’ll figure it out. But worrying about it is scary, and completely normal. Unfortunately.

10. Freshman year will change and shape you, and that is 100% okay

Everyone worries about “becoming someone different” in college and “wanting to stay true to themselves.” At least thats what I’ve had literally 5 different incoming freshman tell me in the past 48 hours… Look, you will change. You will realize who you really are, put up with less shit, make truer friends, and put yourself first. You will become more self reliant, more determined, stronger, and more vulnerable all in one. You will have experiences- both good and bad- that will change you for the rest of your life. That’s what college is. Don’t be afraid. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes, to fuck up, to do something that the person you were in high school wouldn’t do. Life isn’t about finding out who you are, it’s about creating yourself. By going to college you’re being given one of the greatest opportunities of a lifetime, take it by the horns, enjoy yourself and you will change by consequence. You will grow up, because face it. That’s exactly what you’re doing. It’s terrifying and some days you will want to curl up and watch disney movies and color and pretend you’re 4 again. But reality will hit you, you’re 18, 19, 20 years old and older. You’re growing up, and becoming exactly who you’re supposed to be. Don’t fight it, embrace it- and be happy with it.

I know this was the cheesiest post I have ever made. But it’s all true. Every bit of it. College has changed my life, and all of these were things I learned freshman year. I wouldn’t change it for the world.

The Conjuring

Last night  I went to go see the movie The Conjuring. I had heard it was “terrifying,” “gripping,” and “the scariest movie I have ever seen.”

I’m a giant scary movie fan. I absolutely love them, but lately not many scare me in the way that I want them to. Most of them these days are predictable, and aren’t meant to leave you scared once you leave the movie theater.

However this movie was different. I have never jumped as much as I did during parts of this movie. It was terrifying in a lot of parts. Spirits, devil hauntings, and possessed dolls leave this movie making you want to research the Warren family and what they did while they were alive.

Yes, the Warren family is real. Ed and Lorraine Warren, who are the ghost hunters portrayed in the movie, have been ghost hunting for 50 years and actually did a case that the Conjuring in based on. Actually, they have a case file of over 4,000 cases and founded the New England Society for Psychic Research.

While The Conjuring may be the scariest movie I have seen in a long time, Lorraine Warren told Yahoo Movies that it isn’t the scariest house she has ever been in.

Have you ever seen the movie Amityville Horror?

I have. And while it is not a scary movie (at least it isn’t up to my par) Lorraine Warren says it is the one house she will never step foot in again, claiming that it “followed her across the country.”

After researching the Warren family and learning more about their style of research, and seeing some of their results it really makes me wonder, both as a religious follower, and as a scary movie buff where the truth lies, and where the movie begins. I have never once actually believed in ghosts or demonic possessions- in my branch of faith we believe that there are other aspects of God versus the Devil rather than demons walking the earth in hauntings- but this movie and the research I did after it are causing me to wonder.

All in all, research the Warren family BEFORE you go see the movie. I promise you, if you want to be scared out of your wits, your research will help you. Because you will have the real images in your mind instead of just the ones shown on the film.

It’s a fantastic movie, and one that scared me beyond anything I have seen in a long tim!

Internet Lawyers

Recently, the George Zimmerman trial has concluded. According to the notifications from both CNN and NYT that were blowing up my phone last night, the man has been found not guilty. 

For a trial that has been going on what seems like forever, this isn’t the ending that most people wanted to see. Most people wanted to see justice for the death of the young boy, and just like a another disappointing recent case, that of Casey Anthony, those that were looking to see a conviction were disappointed.

And cue everyone on every single social networking site known to man becoming internet lawyers. 

My twitter timeline was full of things from “Zimmerman should have been convicted. This isn’t just.” to “God will deal with him now, he has to answer to someone.” to the not so kindly worded, but quite a bit more colorful “Fuck the justice system.” 

My facebook newfeed was (and still is) full of statuses such as “You don’t get to follow someone, get into an altercation, kill them, then claim self-defense.” to “This is a really sad moment for the American justice system, but I would urge everyone to (at least try) keep a cool head during this. No one else should get hurt because of George Zimmerman.” and more. 

Now, while I am nowhere near saying that people shouldn’t post about the trial, I do think that everyone should take into account just a few short things before posting everywhere. 

1. The American justice system is in place because that is how American’s have elected to keep it. If you want to change it, you have the power- work and change it, don’t just complain about it.

2. It was a high profile trial, which means that the things that happen during this trial are watched closely, the lawyers within the trial are wanting to get recognized, and are going to do certain things specifically because it is a high profile case.

3. It was a high profile trial, which means that the outcome that happened during this trial, happens almost once a week and it doesn’t cause a national uproar, but in a case like this it does.

I don’t care your opinion. Whether Zimmerman is guilty, or not guilty in your mind the justice system has found him not guilty. In our system you must be able to be found guilty without reasonable doubt, and during this trial the prosecution was not about to provide that. The defense was able to portray enough doubt the persuade the jury. That is how our legal system works in america, that is how lawyers are taught and learn to operate.

Now like I said, feel free to post as you will and as you like- clearly, because I’m posting this it would be hypocritical for me to tell you not to. But remember when you do that this trial is a prime example of how the justice system in america works, and that Zimmerman had an amazing defense attorney. As a future lawyer, that lawyer has amazing skills to showcase things that the prosecution was lacking. Again, I’m not going to state my personal opinion, and honestly both sides of the debate can be seen. But this mans life, the justice of a young boy, and the opinions of a jury of peers shows that Zimmerman is not guilty, consider that and the reasons why yourself. 

Misconception

Have you ever thought you could trust someone 100000% and they turn around and make you regret everything you ever thought about them?

I honestly just cannot grasp my head around right now what makes people do this. I have been trying to figure out for the last half an hour what makes people deceive other people. We’ve all told the little white lie, “I’m sick” so we don’t have to go to school or “I have plans” so we don’t have to hang out with people that we hate. But not once have I ever told a lie so hard and so cold that it completely crushes and breaks someones heart. Especially someone that cared about me more than that have cared about anyone else in a long time. 

I have a really hard time trying to understand why people do things like this. Breaking other peoples hearts can’t be a fun experience, and it can’t be an awesome feeling to take the trust that someone instilled in you and throw it on the ground and stomp on it.

How can you so blatantly disregard other peoples feelings? How can you tear apart something that you swore meant so much to do?

No matter what it is, if it’s a relationship, a friendship, a family member- how does this ever even happen? I’m honestly at a loss for words and needed to get the question out there. I normally have the answers to what I blog about, but this is just me grasping for answers.

Because I just don’t know. 

The struggle of weight loss

I have struggled with my weight my entire life. My dad does, my grandma does and I do. But multiple times I have told myself that I’m going to change and lose weight. But for some reason, no matter how hard I work or what I do, I always find myself going back into my old habits.

This time when that happened, I’ve found myself kicking myself repeatedly. Last time I went through a lifestyle change, I lost 50 pounds, and in the last 4 months I have gained almost all of that back because I’ve been lazy and using “I’m busy” as an excuse to not do what needs to be done both with eating healthy and with going to the gym.

Today, I woke up and was still tired and it hit me like a ton of bricks. If I don’t change this now, I’m going to be feeling like this and worse for the rest of my life. I’m going to be like my grandmother and have diabetes, and barely be able to walk up the steps to my grandkids apartments. I don’t want that. I want to be able to be a fun grandma when it comes time- hell I want to be able to be a fun mom when it comes time.

So I’m vowing to myself, and to the public (I mean I am posting this on my blog) that I’m going to change for good this time. Everything happens in small steps, and my first small step is to go back to eating healthy. I was doing so well last time when shit hit the fan, and my first giant hurdle is going to be being able to get through the first week of school without slipping up.

If I can get through the next two months, I will have lost probably around 20 pounds, and be well on my way to healthier, happier Stephanie.

If y’all have any advice for me, or anything please comment. I hate doing things like this alone and starting completely over on something that you thought you had already conquered is a completely discouraging feeling. But in the end I’m telling myself right now, I’m done struggling with weight loss. My health, and my life are too important.

“I’m never drinking again.”

Last night a few of my friends from work came over and we started drinking and hanging out. I made a batch of margaritas and we each had a few. Then we all went out to the lake, passed through a sobriety check point and searched to find the dock of another one of friends aunt so that we could go swimming. We never found it but I enjoyed the memories of just hanging out with my friends and enjoying their company.

However as the night got later, one of my friends ended up staying later than the rest. She’s been going through a lot lately and she ended up crying and telling me about a lot of things happening and the depths of their effect on her. She told me a lot of things she doesn’t/hasn’t ever told anyone else and she depended on me. We drank more and more, and took quite a few tequila shots.

She was going to stay the night so she didn’t have to drive home, but one of her friends ended up needing her to come pick them up. She waited an hour, drank some water and calmed herself down and then left to pick them up telling me she was going to come back because she didn’t want to go home. This was around 3am, I waited up until 5am and she never came back.

So I passed out. About an hour later I woke up and went to my fridge getting out a gallon of water and proceeding to take two advil and drinking half of the gallon of water before passing out on my bed again.

I did that so I didn’t wake up with a hangover, however when I woke up at noon I was still drunk. Rolling over and groaning I went back to sleep and woke up about 2pm.

Hence my typical, “I’m never drinking again” statement.

Every time I drink, I wake up the next morning saying the exact same statement. And for some reason I always end up doing it again anyways. I don’t understand it, but it always happens. I’m not one of those people who drinks to get away from her feelings (like one of my friends), and I’m not one of those people who drinks to get into her feelings (like another one of my friends). I just drink because it’s something to do with my friends.

But something about the statement “I’m never drinking again” unnerves me. Why can I never follow through? I have absolutely no idea, because I like it- I just don’t like the feeling it gives me the next day. Like a bad ex-boyfriend.

Something to figure out in time, but until next time..

I’m never drinking again.